Wednesday, July 23, 2008

this is stupid

i got locked in my house today! yes, locked IN my house! do you know how dumb i feel saying that?

we have electronic locks on our front doors around here. you can either punch in a code or use this little thing that goes on your key chain to get in from the outside. from the inside you just push a button & the door SHOULD lock or unlock. and you can push another button to keep the door locked or unlocked (like someone did one night when i was out very late...but said it wasn't on purpose, rather an accident...but i digress).

well, littlest & i were home alone today & i tried to go out but i couldn't! i kept mashing the button & it kept saying it was unlocked but it was lying. it really wasn't. so i was the redneck in korea hollering out my laundry room window for biggest & middlest who were next door playing. they finally heard me, came up & couldn't get the door open either! at this point i'm kinda panicked...i had to leave to pick 1 up in like 20 i send them to get the property manager who lives on site. he wasn't home so they brought the property manager's wife. so thundering up the stairs come: biggest, middlest, the neighbor guy whom i met while hanging out my laundry room window, the neighbor kid & the property manager's wife. the whole time they are walking up the 6 flights of stairs, i'm pushing the button with the same result as before. then, true to my luck, they all get to the top of the stairs, biggest punches in the code & the door opens! agh! i apologize profusely, biggest & middlest come in the house, everyone else goes back downstairs. biggest pushes the button to open the test it, you know? and what do you know? it's stuck again! apparently it works 1 in 5 times. so i finally get out to get 1 & we come home & it opens. i change the batteries b/c 1 thought that might be what was wrong with it. nope. still stuck! so i'm locked in the house again!

then the realtor calls. apparently i'm not supposed to go get the property manager on my own. apparently i'm supposed to call her so she can call him (does the term around your ass to get to your elbow mean anything to anyone?). oops, sorry, claustrophobia will make you do irrational things. she promised to have someone here in 5 minutes to rescue us but it's been like 25. no telling what's going on. i really hope the dog doesn't have to pee anytime soon. that could be bad.

upside? tonight is laundry night! i guess if i can't get out to do it, it won't get done, now will it? haha!

Sunday, July 20, 2008


apparently 1 has brought me to the land of huge bugs & big storms. not sure if i was given some bad information (ahem) before agreeing to move here or if he was but either way some things i wasn't expecting have come to light.

i hate bugs. oh my gosh despise bugs with all my passion & if there were no bugs here, i wouldn't miss them. spiders? all that times a kazillion. for real. so tell me why i'm living in a country where bugs outnumber humans by about 4000 to 1? and that's saying a lot considering how many people are crammed into this illinois sized area. and apparently 37% of the spiders are camped out in places that i go. often. such as 1-my porch, 2-the water park, 3-outside the laundromat & last but absolutely not least for heavens sake 4-in the skylight OUTSIDE MY FRONT DOOR. gah. they tell people who are afraid of heights to not look down. i should not ever look up. because that's when i see the massive black fat bodied spider appearing to attempt to land on my head. oh my word. i'd rather deal with a palmetto bug than them fat ass spiders.

i have hired biggest to kill the centi-milli-kilo-pedes that are stalking me. i swear they are. everytime i turn a corner another one appears. and you can't tell me it's the same one since biggest grabs them & flattens them & flushes them. see ya sucker! he gets paid $.05 per bug/spider he demolishes. middlest was interested in the program until she discovered that it meant being on call for massive black fat bodied spiders as well. then she changed her mind. she tried to kill one of those MBFBS the other day with a hose. it jumped on her, she shrieked & that was the end of her campaign.

we heard that there were no thunderstorms around here. ahahaha. we heard wrong. a massive one showed up directly over our house the other day at 5AM. surprisingly, littlest didn't budge from her slumber in the middle of our bed. not sure how that happened as the dog was climbing all over everyone in the bed until the storm moved out & he settled down. crazy canine. and now we are waiting for typhoon kalmaegi to show up tomorrow. in the states, we'd be boarding up windows & fighting in the aisles of walmart for the last bottle of water. here? meh. we just sit & wait & maybe we'll get some rain & maybe we'll get some wind & most assuredly the kids will stay inside all day hogging up all the electronic devices. boooooringgggg. not to mention it is monsoon season & any rain kalmaegi doesn't bring, the monsoons certainly will. apparently they are behind schedule this year so it hasn't been too bad thus far. we'll see what the next few days brings.

i suppose the silver lining to all this is that excessive rain=cooler than 2000 degrees in my house. i guess that counts for something.

swimming pool observations

i think i was getting jaded as it has been a way long time since i "observed" anything! so, without further ado, observations from the swimming pool/water park!
earlier observations reside here:

1-an earlier observation stated that the ladies here wear heels or boots with everything. yes, that still holds true. esp. since i saw a lady at the water park today in her bathing suit with a pair of 3 (or was it 4? they were HIGH!) inch heels on standing next to the middle kid pool. no kidding. she was standing about a foot from the water talking to someone. i had seen a pair of heels next to a pool chair before but never saw anyone in them. until today. i am happy to report, though, that she took them off before she went down the water slide.

2-speedos. need i say more. i mean, if they were just on little kids it wouldn't be that big a deal. but they aren't. yikes. and then there are the guys who wear the super-duper-tight-&-i'm-going-to-be-an-olympian-when-i-grow-up swimming trunk. either way, neither one of them leaves anything to the imagination. i would like my imagination back, now, please!

3-nakie people. in the locker room, not on the pool deck. i guess i've just never really been in places where nakie is normal. when i used to go to the gym, i would shower at home so i wouldn't really use the locker room so i didn't notice nakies. and i guess since we all have the same thing, it really isn't that big a deal. and showing the world your outside & inside during childbirth does kinda ruin any sense of modesty, ya know? but it did just kinda catch me off guard when i walked in the door (covered by those plastic sheet there really isn't a door but you have to push through the sheets to get in...know what i mean?) & there was a lady standing right there! all nakie! aaah! surprise! but judging by the look on her face, i surprised her too. hello lady. it's a doorway. people go in & out. perhaps you should take your boobies elsewhere.

Sunday, July 6, 2008


i could be wrong here. i'm not sure.
there's a guy here in the same country i'm in & he blogs:

1 showed it to me the other day. he's an english teacher & has some interesting observations. one of which was about going to a convenience store & having a relative of one of his students recognize him buying something potentially embarrassing. not sure if it was in the same post or one nearby (trying to catch up to him so am reading a kazillion posts all at once & some get a little confused), but he also spoke about teachers not having to get up at the butt-crack of dawn to get to school on time. which therefore frees them up to have "adult time" more nights of the week than just friday & saturday. maybe it's just me but whenever i go out, the next half day is sponged up by recuperation time which is generally copious amounts of sleep. so butt-crack or not, i probably wouldn't be a most effective teacher on any morning where i went & partied down the night before.

and the point is... (man, i must be the tangent QUEEN!) it doesn't seem that teachers are held to the same "holier than thou" standard around here as they are in the states. it is probably just the culture. they take/eat/drink/snort (haven't really figured it out yet) ginseng which is supposed to be healthy, drink (i know this one!) vitamin drinks, don't seem to eat (hey 2 points!) as much fatty garbage as americans do (course McD's is probably going to change that) & i don't see an awful lot of fatties running around here. but they do smoke. oh they seem to love to smoke. all the time, everywhere. it doesn't appear that it has been illegalized anywhere here at this point. and nowhere seems to have a designated smoking section except on base (duh, it's american!). while i don't much care for the kids being exposed to smoke, i can keep them away from it for the most part. but if they want to do it, whatev. no skin off my nose. that & the whole soju thing. whoo hoo! drink another! we see it everywhere. it's the thing to drink. apparently teacher friend drinks a lot of it. whoopy doo again. he doesn't seem to have any concern about purchasing either of these items (although i'm not sure if he's a smoker or not) from his student's family members at the family mart.

i would think that as long as my child's teacher was doing his/her job TEACHING & not screwing my child up, i don't much worry about what they do after the bell rings. so long as it is not illegal, who cares? is what a teacher does on his private time going to affect my child? as long as it remains on their private time & not in the classroom, i think live & let live is a good philosophy to follow. i feel like in the states, teachers are scrutinized for every little thing. and, since they are guiding the young minds of tomorrow, perhaps they should be but within reason. they should not be forced to give up all of their private lives just because of their choice of profession. and i think it may have to do with all the governmental babysitting going on over there. it's almost as if no one can use their own brains anymore so they have to be told when & where & how often & how much. which curtails a good bit of free expression. and this goes for so many things in the states. it's a shame.

round here, though, it seems to be the attitude of "fork it up, your fault. don't fork up!" there aren't inspectors around to require safety restraints for high-rise workers, people all drive like bats out of hell, scooters are ridden everywhere but up walls, and it's everyone's own responsibility to watch their own ass. not expecting someone to watch it for them. so if a teacher gets a little too yippee ya hoo the night before, who cares? so long as they are ready & willing to do what they gotta do in the morning. and if you happen to purchase a bottle of soju from your student's uncle...does it really matter? careful about unveiling your best korean though as you might get invited to a drinking contest. and that would probably be best undertaken on the weekend.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

um...tense much?

i have an addiction. it's a harmless addiction. it's an online game. a cross between slots & bingo named...get ready for it...SLINGO! no skill necessary, just push the button (slots) & match the numbers that come up to the numbers on your card (bingo). and because i know i could sit here & play it for hours & hours & never put away laundry or change diapers, i limit myself to 3 games at a time. self-control. yup, that's me.

so at 5:30 this morning when littlest decided-against my protests-to get up & get moving, i played a game of slingo while she ate her breakfast. or threw breakfast on the floor, whichever. at 5:30 in the morning, i'm not lucid enough to care or be able to prevent it. or see it but that's another conversation entirely.

there's this nasty little guy who makes his appearance in slingo...he's a devil & when he shows up, he grabs your little character by its foot & shakes it upside down which handily disposes of half of your coins. he sucks. i can't stand him. and it's a "thing" in slingo that when the devil shows up, you type a little "dd" (damn devil) in the chat bar to let people share your pain. and generally you'll get a "ss" (so sorry) back. and that's usually the extent of my chat because usually something else is going on while i'm playing slingo-middlest & biggest beating on each other, littlest throwing food on the floor, 1 asking what's for dinner & when...etc., etc., etc. & honestly? i can't put any more effort into it.

so i'm playing & ignoring the Kix on the floor & get that stupid little guy so i hit "dd" & get a "ss". and a few seconds later, a yw (you're welcome) from the same person. but i didn't notice that until he called my name. um, yes? and jackass proceeds to tell me i didn't say thank you. um, what? so i hit him back with a "manners police much?" because seriously? are you my mom? i passed up needing manners reminders quite a few years ago. dude. this is an online game. so sorry if not getting a thank you ruins your day.

that stupid little game is my escape. the last thing i need is some hyped up asshole telling me that i didn't thank him for typing 2 little letters. get over yourself. get a hobby. find some friends. just try not to police them because they probably won't stick around too long.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

yes! it's not just me!


(click above link)

i am so totally not the only one. thank God. i thought i was one of a dying breed.

when did our (read:American) culture become so entrenched in entitlement? why so much of the "keeping up with the Joneses"? the "he's got one & now i NEED one" outlook on life? where did the live within your means & be happy with what you have rather than unhappy with what you don't have mentality disappear off to?

last year while frantically trying to pack up my house (that never did get finished, by the way, until the temps moved in & finished it for us. thanks bunches!) amidst my first year of homeschool & a always fussy baby, i discovered that we had way.too.much.crap. i mean really. so much stuff got thrown/given away last september/october. and i doubt i will ever miss any of it. who needs all that junk? i had like 17 vases. um. and they all looked pretty much the same. um again. i think i kept 2. why on earth would i need more than that? there was just too much junk to mention. and judging by the amount of junk, we just kept buying more on top of more. why? what is the point?

i guess i should fit this in with the cell phone post. i did not own a cell phone until i was 23. or 24. one of those numbers. i had a pager at the age of 18 that i paid for with my own money from my own job. i had nothing before that. there were payphones to be used or my friend's houses all had telephones. in my preteen-early teen years, my mom had a pretty good idea of where i was most times. late teen-not so much but we won't talk about that right now. i feel like i need to have that hold over my children now. there is so much worse stuff out there now compared to 20 years ago (what! that long?) that i don't think my children need to be out roaming amidst it unleashed. so i want to know where they are, who they are with and what they are doing all the time. some may argue that with a cell phone, they are instantly accessible at all times. um. no. speaking from experience here-that damn thing has an off button & it isn't beyond the stretch of most anyone's imagination to use it. and "oops, i didn't realize" would probably be the most common excuse. hell, i turn my ringer off sometimes & forget about it which renders me unreachable and that's accidental (not that many people call me over here, but you get the drift). i'd much prefer my kids have a specific place to be at a specific time & be required to contact me should things change rather than myself have to track their little tails down if i need them.

not to mention the whole texting thing. um, point? like the OP said, why not just pick up the goshdarn phone & call someone? oh, that's right, perhaps a phone ringing at midnight when the telephone cut-off is 9 would give away the game. why put sneakiness into the hands of children? they are predisposed to test any and all limits imposed on them. i, for one, don't feel we need to tempt them further.

cell phones in my house? mom & dad have one. that's it. temptation does break through on occasion such as when the oldest's friends call 17 times in one day. (he's a BOY. why is he spending so much time on the phone?) and i get tired of answering it. but then i recall all the arguments i just made (they make sense to me, jumbled as they are) against teen+phone & the temptation subsides. there's plenty of time for technology to catch up to us. now is not that time.